Peeling Back the Layers of History

Day Seven: Wednesday 15th June 2011

Performance Broadcast

Part One:

Born-Digital Archive Reference Code: IiS_P.B.16_2011-06-15_log-day-7.1

Part Two:

Screen Shot 2015-11-23 at 16.36.20








Born-Digital Archive Reference Code: IiS_P.B.17_2011-06-15_log-day-7.2

This file no longer exists due to a resource failure in the streaming service of the proprietary software provider for Instability in Stability.*


Excerpts from today’s conversations as documented in the UStream Chat Room:

10:55 am Niamhie: Looking forward to watching!!! 
10:57 am The Loft: Happy Wednesday Everyone!
11:25 am Hi Niamhie thanks you for your email. I totally understand the work 
situation and I appreciate you watching on and off. As I ***ume you will not have 
any sound running I will type some of the questions I am posing to myself and the 
audience so that you may still join in (if you wish).
11:26 am The Loft: so right now I have found two very old pictures and i do not 
know who they are of. I am questions extend families and past generations - who 
they are and whether we any of there physical or personality traits are reproduced 
in the present
11:27 am The Loft: do you have any photographs from past generations in your loft? 
do you know who they are? what they did? if there are any correlations or none it 
would be lovely to hear about them : )
11:38 am Niamhie: Do you find yourself starting to create a story in your head of 
who you think they might be? from what you do know of your family history, are you 
trying to piece the jogsaw together and make the photos fit?
11:40 am Niamhie: I know when I find old photographs it makes me questions my own 
background, particulary if I know they rae of fmaily members. It makes me want to 
ask more, and find out where I have come from and how these people might have 
influenced me- and the stories im told help to bring the photographs to life
11:40 am Niamhie: oops spelling! sorry Cara!
11:42 am Niamhie: I love looking at old photos, they seem to tell a story of their 
own. I've got one in particular of my gran and grandad and theyre sitting at this 
table in a dingy old pub but they look happy as larry! When I look at it I get 
mixed emotions. Theyre still alive and I know them as they are now- but my gran 
now has dementia and short term memory loss- I wonder if I showed her the photo 
whether she'd remember it being taken and where they were etc
11:48 am The Loft: Where were you on Monday 6th October 1986?
11:50 am Niamhie: I would have been just over 4 months old- i presume id be in a 
pram or a cot!!!
11:52 am The Loft: this is a much more positive take on the article i was just 
reading, new life verses the death of another its abeautiful cycle of life
11:53 am Niamhie: The cycle of life is do***ented through photography
11:56 am Niamhie: Without the do***entation we would be clueless, other than what 
we have here in the present day
11:57 am Niamhie: we would have only stories and viewpoints
12:02 pm Niamhie: Do you find it helpful to have both 
memories/viewpoints/testimony as well as physical do***entation in digital forms 
of photography/film?
12:03 pm Niamhie: Yes it helps to have the visual to be able to put it beside the 
story/memory- gives a bigger picture and helps to re-create the 
12:03 pm Niamhie: The past is re-telling stories
12:06 pm Niamhie: The visual (in photos/newspapers etc) definitely helps to create 
a bigger picture
12:07 pm The Loft: this is true and it is good to have different perspectives and 
access to different medias to help us understand better what hapened in the past
12:07 pm Niamhie: The more do***entation the better
12:08 pm Niamhie: Nothing is ever one-sided, the more we can read/see/hear the 
wider the overall picture is
12:08 pm The Loft: i have just returned to the newspaper article about my grandmas 
dead and i was talking about how i has previously understood it from the word of 
mouth of my mum and now i can see it from an outside perspective (accompanied by 
a picture) it puts a different spin on it
12:08 pm Niamhie: and the better the understanding we have on something
12:08 pm The Loft: do you ever think we can have too much do***entation?
12:08 pm Niamhie: It depends on the type of do***entation- how truthful is it?
12:09 pm Niamhie: If it's a story from word of mouth it might be one-sided
12:09 pm Niamhie: likewise, newspapers do***ent something depending on how they 
want it to be perceived
12:10 pm Niamhie: If we can gather as much information on something it helps us to 
come to our own conclusions
12:10 pm Niamhie: Your mums story of your Grandma's death is from a highly 
personal perspective
12:11 pm Niamhie: It's helpful to get an outside view
12:15 pm The Loft: it is but in a funny way the newspaper article was more 
descriptive and yes whilst newspapers can be very manipulated in what they write 
this one was very objective. I know this is incomparrison to my mums subjective 
point of view
12:16 pm The Loft: have you got any relatives who p***ed away before you were born 
who you have become acquainted to through old photographs, letters or newspaper 
12:19 pm Niamhie: my grandparents on my Dad's side died before I was born- I have 
only photographs of them
12:19 pm Niamhie: and stories told from my parents- which are themselves varied 
due to their different personal perspectives!
12:20 pm Niamhie: My Dad is very reluctant to talk about them
12:20 pm Niamhie: I only know what I know about them through my parents and 2 or 3 
12:21 pm The Loft: do you feel like you know them through these small snapshots? 
or are you curious to find out more or just leave things as they are?
12:22 pm Niamhie: i dont feel I know them at all, but im not necessarily curious 
to know more either
12:22 pm Niamhie: I never knew them so I don't feel im missing out on anything
12:23 pm Niamhie: And perhaps im as close to my other grandparents because I only 
ever had one set, so Ive always had time for them
12:26 pm The Loft: thats interesting idea
12:27 pm The Loft: just compared it to my experience with my one set of 
grandparents and the lack of contact i have with them (this could be becuase they 
are on my dads side of the family) but i do have a curiosity to get to know them 
12:29 pm Niamhie: do you think you are more inclined to get to know them better as 
they are still alive?
12:30 pm Niamhie: is it a sense of what if? Do you feel you should get to know 
them while you still have the chance?
12:35 pm The Loft: yes there is a more kind of guilt feeling and a saddness that i 
don't know more but also an excited desire to hear more from them when they speak 
about past events or jobs they did. also my grandma travelled a bit she used to 
hitchhike! so i was inspired by that
12:36 pm The Loft: they are quite feisty people but really quiet and p***ive they 
never make an effort so it makes it hard for me to - especially when they have 
been the adults in the situation as i was growing up
12:36 pm The Loft: but i know it is now my turn to make an effort
12:39 pm Niamhie: I suppose you are excited to hear more as you have evolved from 
12:39 pm Niamhie: Things that you can relate to about them make you inspired and 
intrigued to know more! It makes you wonder how much they have influenced you 
without you knowing!
12:40 pm Niamhie: The past can influence your future decisions- perhaps the 
stories about them from your mum's side have made you less inclined to contact 
12:42 pm Niamhie: Maybe you could begin by writing them a letter and corresponding 
this way? Do***enting your effort to build more of a relationship 
with them? Goes with the personal aspect of your project
12:47 pm The Loft: Ah this is all very true apart from the stories from my mums 
side- she has always been extremely good she will never bad mouth anyone and has 
always left it up to me and my sister to make decisions about people for ourselves
12:48 pm Niamhie: Thats good- left it open for you to decide!
12:48 pm The Loft: i think she made every civil and pleasant effort she could and 
at the end of the day it takes both sides to want to make it work. and whilst i 
dont think my grandparents are the 
kind to not want to make it work i think they would feel like they were intruding 
so they prefer to remain on the otuside in a old fashion sort of way
12:49 pm The Loft; but the idea of writing a letter is beautiful and a very simple 
way of being in contact that they can relate to - i was explaining how i write 
them a postcard from everywhere i go.
12:49 pm The Loft: do you ever write to your grandparents? what kind of ways do 
you stay in contact - especially when you are away from home?
12:49 pm Niamhie: But in someway or another ( possibly without realising) you 
might be influenced by the stories you have heard and also you have a duty to your 
mum- if you know she was hurt by a situation you are going to feel like you want 
to protect her
12:50 pm Niamhie: I never write unless its birthday cards etc
12:50 pm Niamhie: I call them all the time, maybe 3 times a week
12:50 pm Niamhie: My gran has dementia so I like to call so she doesn't forget who 
I am as I can't see them as often as id like
12:50 pm The Loft: do you speak to your grandparents more than your mum and dad?
12:50 pm Niahmie: yes definitely
12:51 pm Niamhie: I rarely speak to my Dad
12:51 pm Niamhie: I don't feel like I need to
12:51 pm Niamhie: thats an intriguing thought the need and drive to communicate 
and the knowing that if we dont communicate in certain respects with certain 
people things will be ok
12:51 pm Niamhie: I feel it's more important to speak to my Grandparents as you 
never know when they might p*** on and I want to make the most of my time with 
them even if I can't physically be with them
12:52 pm Niamhie: yeah there's always some people you can go for ages not speaking 
to but when you meet you know it will be fine
12:52 pm The Loft: this is quite powerful and makes a lot of sense
12:52 pm The Loft: for both your grandparents and for friends we loose contact ith
12:52 pm The Loft: you just have this mutual understanding that you know each 
other well enough
12:53 pm Niamhie: Even though you might not be in contact physically, they are 
with you in your mind
12:53 pm Niamhie: you have shared memories and experiences that stay with you- 
imprinted in your thoughts
12:54 pm Niamhie: and you will always share these memories- a kind of personal 
do***entation I guess?!
12:54 pm The Loft: they are like a pool of memories we house in reserve for the 
time when we can meet again
12:54 pm Niamhie: exactly!
12:54 pm Niamhie: the memories bond you
12:54 pm The Loft: perhaps an unspoken do***entation an unwritten do***entation - 
that which happens between the lines
12:56 pm The Loft: random devils advocate question ...can people be friends 
without having a bond?
12:56 pm Niamhie: and the memory will vary depending on the person
12:57 pm Niamhie: what you might remember from it might differ from your friend
12:57 pm The Loft: i am really draw to the idea you present as experiences and 
memories bring people together and fuse a friendship
12:58 pm Niamhie: I think the bond is more a feeling- that a person "gets you". If 
you don't get this feeling im not sure the bond is there. You have some people you 
get on with, but it wouldn't be the end of the world if you never saw them again 
and likewise it'd be nice to see them.
12:58 pm The Loft: also what happens if memory dies? like the notion of dementia 
does that make a friendship fall apart?
12:59 pm Niamhie: Where as with other friends if you have that bond its an 
emotional not physical bond- a feeling that you both have and you know you'll 
always be friends even if you don't see each other for 10 years
1:00 pm Niamhie: I think with dementia from what I have seen in my Gran, she 
remembers the old memories, the things she used to love and the good feelings she 
1:00 pm Niamhie: She does say to me though she doesn't remember anyone any more- 
like people she used to recognise in the street
1:00 pm Niamhie: I said to her once "But you remember me though right" and she got 
shirty and said don't be so silly ofcourse I remeber yu!
1:01 pm Niamhie: And she always remembers when im coming home to see her, without 
a doubt!
1:02 pm Niamhie: She'll remember for weeks, count down the days- and yet she can't 
remeber silly things like how to go to the toilet
1:05 pm The Loft: wow incredible, so it seems that she is completely sound of mind 
but perhaps her muscle memory is dying and her sensory memory is starting to slow 
1:06 pm The Loft: whilst her brain and mental capacity to talk and interact with 
people she knows and loves is more heighten because of the lack of the other 
memory faculties
1:13 pm Niamhie: well I wouldn't say completely sound of mind- she forgets the 
simplest things easily. But she says to me " I know i'm going crazy" which is the 
hardest bit I guess. Can you imagine knowing your not all there anymore?
1:14 pm Niamhie: She knows who I am and it makes her day to see me, but it's 
difficult having a conversation with her as she gets words the wrong way round, 
and forgets what word is what- so you have to sort of piece the sentences 
together. But because I know her I know what she's trying to say, so I sort of 
guess the right words and then she remebers and agrees with me
1:19 pm The Loft: that is sad, but the joy it brings her must be stimulating for 
both of you. its admirable that you have so much paitence
1:20 pm The Loft: do you have any situations whereby you end up finishing other 
peoples sentences for them or they finish yours just because you know them so well
1:20 pm Niamhie: yes all the time
1:21 pm Niamhie: particularly my closest friends
1:21 pm Niamhie: its like we know what each other are thinking
1:21 pm Niamhie: sometimes I can know what they are thinkking with just a look
1:21 pm Niamhie: or we will say the same thing at exactly the same time, in the 
same tone of voice
1:22 pm Niamhie: its weird!!!
1:27 pm The Loft: hahahaha
1:27 pm The Loft: parallel random synchronisation
1:29 pm Niamhie: or just spending too much time together!
1:29 pm Niamhie: personailites merge
1:43 pm Nicki H: Hi Cara, I'm enjoying listening to your read the letters!!
1:44 pm Nicki H: Your talk of holidays is making me day dream...
1:49 pm Nicki H: I would like to go somewhere a million miles away from what I 
1:49 pm Nicki H: A change of culture to explore what else is out there
1:50 pm Nicki H: Toyoko - for the chance to explore the vast level of technology 
and then the poler opposites, like a deserted beach on an island off Thailand
1:52 pm Nicki H: I would also love to go to a safari park in Africa!
1:53 pm Nicki H: No, have not been travelling as of yet, but lots of places where 
I want to go! I have mainly been to Europe and America when I was younger.
1:54 pm Nicki H: Yes, depending on where you are I think there is a difference
1:55 pm Nicki H: Do you like the busy atmosphere and the hustle of the big cities?
1:56 pm Nicki H: I live in the CIty and love busy dream is to go to 
New York
1:57 pm Nicki H: But I am equally happy to lay on a beach and soak in the 
atmosphere all by myself with my music
1:58 pm Nicki H: Morcheeba - best music to listen to on the beach! Lovely to chat 
- will speak to you soon!
2:01 pm The Loft: thank you, speak soon!
2:02 pm The Loft: niamhie if you're still around where would you like to travel to 
most in the world? do you have any places you have promised yourself to go to 
and/or someone else? and thirdly do you think theres a difference between going 
abroad, going on holiday and going travelling??

Challenges that arose from today’s Chat discussions:

Challenge 14:

Write a letter to my Grandparents [created by Niamhie]


Archive Appointments

Born-Digital Archive Reference Code: IiS_A.A.11_2011-06-15_14.55_Cat_Dinopoulou_log-day-7

Born-Digital Archive Reference Code: IiS_A.A.12_2011-06-15_15.56_Ellie_Ruddock_log-day-7

Challenges that arose from the Archive Appointments:

Challenge 15:

Wear a different set of clothes every day you are broadcasting in the loft [created by Ellie Ruddock]

*note added 16th June 2011

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